We are all taught to love and respect our fellow human beings, just as we love and respect ourselves... But there is a problem, we are our own worst critics. We know all of our faults, our insecurities, our shortcomings, and whether we acknowledge it not, we hate ourselves for them. So how are we supposed to love our neighbors as ourselves, if we do not even like who we are?
The answer will not come from beating ourselves up, and telling ourselves that we need to love ourselves, that we should love ourselves. It will not come from being disgusted at our character flaws, and punishing ourselves for our bad habits. Punishment, hate, disgust will not lead to love. Only love can lead to love. Hate will only lead to more hate.
You must have compassion for yourself, flaws, and bad habits especially. Because after all it is those parts of ourselves that we dislike, those traits that cause us to suffer that need our compassion and love the most... If you have compassion for yourself, if you let go of those standards you judge yourself by (standards that upon closer inspection are generally ungrounded and untrue) you will no longer be disappointed in yourself! You will realize that you are perfect, that in this moment, this second you are right where you should, just as you should be...
The key is to love yourself, no matter what! Only then, only after you no longer disapprove of yourself in anyway, for anything, can you truly love your neighbor as yourself... And if you have compassion, then "their" pain will become your pain, and you will react accordingly. Just as you would if it were your hand on the stove...
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